Sunday, July 6, 2008

It's time to Revolt

You know what makes me crazy? Drives me up the wall and fills me with the desire to storm restaurant kitchens and have words with the chef? Good, because I'm about to tell you.

I HATE IT when I am at a restaurant and see garlic bread on the menu, and thinking, "Yum, garlic and bread together is one of heaven's greatest gifts," order the garlic bread only to receive a basket of slices of french bread with a butter/garlic powder mixture on it. That is not garlic bread. That is bread with a garlicky butter on it. Putting garlic in some form on top of bread does not make the bread itself garlic bread. In fact, putting anything on top of bread does not change the type of bread that one has. You do not put peanut butter on bread and call it peanut butter bread. (ooooh! Peanut butter bread! Delightful! Hurry, someone go invent that and send it to me. And maybe to Sara Lee or something, too, because that stuff will be HUGE.) You do not put jam on bread and call it jam bread. (Although you do put butter and cinnamon and sugar on toast and call it cinnamon toast... odd.)

Garlic bread is bread that actually contains garlic. La Brea makes a wicked roasted garlic loaf that has beautiful, lovely chunks of roasted garlic in it. It is delightful with dinner and for making eggs in a basket the next morning. THAT is garlic bread, my friends. Not this french-bread-with-butter-and-garlic-powder passed off as garlic bread at restaurants and grocery stores and dinner tables nationwide. And I am not going to take it anymore. No siree, next time that happens to me I am SENDING IT BACK. And then probably leaving, because I don't want to eat a dinner that has been spat upon. But I will have made my point. Take THAT, lazy restaurateurs!